The Big Picture

The big picture is often overlooked. For some reason a lot of us only think about right now or tomorrow, when we should be looking ahead. I know the scriptures tell us not to worry about tomorrow, but that's not really what I am getting at. A lot of times, we see ourselves unhappy in the moment and cannot seem to get ourselves out of a certain mood, therefore, it affects everyone in the family. I am definitely guilty of this!!! Some days I can't see past that very hour or that very day!! My hope is that we can all see into the future for our children and for our spouses.

Just in talking with friends and getting into deep discussion, I see that we all have about the same issues. What makes the difference is the way we deal with these issues. We can all be a little more patient or give our spouse a little more time. Some people have to resolve issues immediately and some of us want a little more space. If you can create a "rule book" for one another, maybe you can resolve issues smoothly. It is always a challenge at our house! The only thing you can do is be considerate of your spouses feelings. Try to put yourself in their shoes. I was recently on a ten day trip without my spouse and as I was going along, I realized how much I do rely on him. I know we do things differently, but it made me realize how much teamwork is really involved. I came home missing him like crazy and hoping that I could learn a lesson, which is not taking him for granted!! One lesson on teamwork ladies, is if you need help from your husband, you should ask!!! He will never know how much you need him until you let him know. Tell him your feelings and give him time to accept what you say. Men sometimes take our feelings as an attack when it is anything but that. You should take time to explain your well thought out feelings and do it at a time when the children are preoccupied or over a nice date night!!! At first, your spouse may be surprised by what he is hearing, but if the two of you make time each week to sit down and share your feeling with each other, it will help you reach your future goals TOGETHER! So many people these days are giving up on each other. If we can just see the future as a team and know that whatever the current struggle is WILL pass, we can make our marriages stronger and make more of it. It was recently brought to my attention by a friend, that the marriages she observed, no longer seemed to have passion. Can we pull each other closer? Give more kisses (that last more than one second), touch each other lovingly? The more you try to show love to your spouse, the more natural it becomes. Ladies, can we welcome our husbands home from work with a smile or "how was your day" instead of unloading on them about how bad our day was? Men, can you give your wife the night off once a week? These small changes can make a huge difference in the way we feel about one another.

The future is a huge part of RIGHT NOW. Take the time to enjoy your spouse while you can. Each phase of life passes quickly and we are thrown right into something else we didn't expect. No one can prepare you for the things in your life. You have to take it and make the best of your circumstances. Sometimes when the children do not agree on something, I tell them to sit on the steps until they can come to an agreement, and they are not allowed to get up until the agreement is made. Maybe we should also do this in our marriages! Do not take your spouse for granted....God has not promised us tomorrow, but it never hurts to plan ahead. If you are not giving your best to your family, then who [or what] are you giving your best to?